30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge

I know it has been a while since I have blogged about my 30-Day Challenges.  It is not that I have stopped doing them.   It's just that after returning from an amazing time working and living in Cambodia, I was dealing with a couple of Life-related things back in Sydney - I needed some Me time to heal, learn and grow.  I kept up my 30-Day Challenges though, because it was a way for me to keep things light and interesting.   I think this is the great thing about giving yourself a little challenge: it makes you realise how much you can do even when you are struggling; it is a reminder that life is constantly flowing and moving.  With that said, I return to this little home, revamping it to reflect some newness in my life.

Onto my most recent 30-Day Challenge: the 30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge.  Ash is my partner, currently working and living in Tokyo, Japan.  I have never really had any positive feelings about long-distance relationships.  My first one did not end too well, probably because I was 20 going on 21 at the time, and was hungry for some independence.  I dislike the prospects of not being able to show affection to your loved one (one of my love languages is "physical touch"), and I am sometimes overwhelmed by the constant  missing and longing for your loved one.  Alas, I am in a long-distance relationship with my best friend.  It is hard at times, but we are learning to value what we share between us and we are also being innovative with how we can continue to grow whilst being physically apart.

Screenshot of braingpickings.org, an excellent blog by Maria Popova

This Challenge was suggested by Ash.  I was having trouble figuring out what I was going to do after my 30-Day Knitting Challenge, so I asked him for some suggestions.  There was a story he heard on The Tim Ferriss Show (an excellent podcast which I highly recommend), where an elderly couple would read three brainpickings.org's each day and send each other their favourite piece.  Inspired by this elderly couple's desire to stay intellectually engaged with each other, Ash suggested we send an article to each other everyday for a month.  I thought it was a brilliant idea because 1) it provided an alternative way for me and him to keep in touch and; 2) I love his insights into Life. So began the 30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge.

The Challenge itself was easy at first, since I was reading lots of articles on the Internet anyway.  Link after link, there is an endless wonder of different perspectives and issues and topics that I can spend time thinking about.  One day I'd be reading about the life of Virginia Woolf, the next I'd be dabbling in a world of rhetoric and what it means to be an expat.  I also learnt about the vagina, a healing technique called Emotional Freedom Tapping, and most interestingly, why Indian cuisine is so damn tasty.  I would link Ash to these articles in an email, including my own thoughts and annotations to what the articles have offered me.  In response, he would reply with his thoughts on my articles, a link to a new article (related or otherwise) and his thoughts on that.  

Screenshot of Day 12 Article to Ash, March 2015.

It was a bit challenging at times.  I had returned to Sydney to finish off my final semester of university studies and forgot how much time this took up.  I realised with studying, I did not have as much time as I wanted to scour the Internet for a worthy article to share with Ash.  I am not too sure if it was the same in his case, as he started full-time work at his firm.  Admittedly, I sometimes did not send an article, but rather a poem or an infographic, and would elaborate on what it meant to me at that time.  One day, Ash sent me rap lyrics that articulated the pervasive racism beautifully.  We were successful in completing the Challenge, sending each other an article (or otherwise) everyday in March 2015.

The exchange between us allowed us to Be with each other - an intellectual connection which distance had no bearing on.  The Challenge helped me navigate my own anxieties with being in a long-distance relationship, and taught me to see the alternative ways of staying connected with a loved one.  The Challenge has also taught me that we were at liberty to define our relationships.  You see, in the past I would often get caught up in the narrative of long-distance, associating only negative connotations to the concept.  I think the negativity I attached to long-distance relationships started to break down after I met some incredible people in amazing long-distance relationships during my time in Cambodia.  It was incredibly inspiring and each couple had their own struggles and happy tales to share.  But I never really got it until I started practicing in my own long-distance relationship; there is a difference between learning about tripping over and actually tripping over in real life.  It is this latter, experience-based learning that I was able to pick up in my 30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge.  I am grateful to have a partner who participated in the Challenge with me, allowing us to grow as we did (and continuing to do so in this moment).

30-Day Drawing Challenge

First off, my quest to blog here once a week has really gone down the drain, but for a very good reason: I have really come around to embracing life here in Phnom Penh. The month of May was just so exciting and was filled with many amazing moments here in Cambodia, in the company of amazing people (I seriously cannot emphasise this enough). Luckily, I decided that I was going to do a 30-Day Drawing Challenge that month, and now have a sketch book of memories of the amazing month that was.

I decided to do this Challenge because I realised I was way too dependent on words to express myself and was only utilising half my brain. So in a quest to use the creative side of my noggin, I decided to draw everyday for 30 days. 

My sketch of lunch at the Russian Markets, PHNOM PENH 2014 (notice my inability to draw the food lady)

I should mention that by no means am I a drawer - I think the last time I sketched something was over a year ago for my 30-Day Draw What You Eat Challenge (more on that next time). But making people think you were a sketch artist was pretty cool, until they saw how dodgy my sketches were haha! The first couple of sketches were pretty average - nothing I was really proud of because my drawing skills were definitely lacking given the many years of neglect. I mean, we all used to draw when we were kids because we didn't know any other way to express ourselves. The act of picking up a pencil and putting that to paper and drawing a smiley face was something so damn natural to all of us. We just sometimes forget that in a world of words (at least in my world).

Attempt at trying to capture the beauty of nature, MONDULKIRI 2014

Slowly but surely, my drawing skills improved. I was lucky enough to be living with a professional illustrator who gave me awesome tips on how to make my drawing better: always have a sharp pencil, shade with pencil and not your finger, start with copying a still image before trying to draw from memory etc. These tips really allowed me to embrace drawing and really come to enjoy the slow and meditative effect drawing had to offer. I also learnt a couple of things about drawing myself: that natural landscapes were very hard to capture in a single sketch, that I wasn't very good at drawing people, but that I was better at drawing animals and food.

Drink & Draw, PHNOM PENH 2014

During the Challenge, I also attended my first Drink & Draw here in Phnom Penh, where my good-looking housemate was the life model for the event. It was such an awesome first experience of life drawing. There was 5 x 20 second poses, followed by 5 x 1 minute poses, then 2 x 5 minute poses, 1 x 10 minute pose, 1 x 20 minute poses and 1 x 30 minute pose. After the whole thing was over, I felt incredilbly in awe of my life model-housemate's ability to be so still, I was so inspired by my illustrator-housemate's creative skills, and was amazed at how I had just spent two whole hours drawing a human being whilst consuming copious amount of delicious tea doused with tumeric. It was such a cool experience. 

Charlie Chaplin to signify an awesome day, PHNOM PENH 2014

I have yet to draw since the completion of the Challenge. This is probably because I felt my beautifully bound leather journal being neglected, and felt compelled to write out my thoughts and feelings about Cambodia and how awesome it has been to me instead. I realised there are some things better expressed in words, but sometimes a drawing has the ability to bring back a million memories in a single instant - my final drawing of Charlie Chaplin symbolises the amazing day I had at the end of the month, a day I wish to never forget because it was one of those seredipitous days where amazing things just simply happened. 

30-Day No Alcohol Challenge

I was given my first drink at my 16th birthday party. It was a couple bottle of sweet and delicious (at the time) vodka cruisers. My first experience of alcohol was a pleasant one - I felt very happy and did not get sick. Having said that, I did not find drinking particularly exciting. I asked dad why he drank a bottle of beer a day, to which he said that a bottle of beer a day was good for the body. I, being the righteous brat I was, said that alcohol hurt the liver and vowed I would not start drinking til I was 25, because I was taught that was when our livers were fully developed and was capable of properly breaking down the alcohol.

I started going out and drinking proper upon turning 18 - the legal drinking age in Australia - and totally ignored what my 16-year-old said about alcohol and our bodies and all that. Being able to drink and party was damn liberating, and made life sorta exciting. Parties were being had left, right and centre to coincide with the end of high school; hanging out at bars and clubs were the thing to do; and ordering a glass of wine/cocktail at a restaurant with your meal made you feel more grown up than ever. It was nice being able to be an adult (ha!). During my year abroad in Canada, living in an university student town, my drinking increased exponentially. I was drinking five nights a week because it was definitely the thing to do socially. Drinking, either at a bar or at a house gathering/party, allowed for bonding and experiences to be shared - social lubricating at its best.

One litre mason jars served at La Distillerie, Montreal, CANADA 2011

Of course, I realised all this drinking (and post-drinking poutine) was not good for my body. I had gained weight and became rather unfit, not that I was fit to begin with. But when I came back to Australia, my drinking did slowly decline, mainly because everything was ten times more expensive in Sydney than in the small town of Kingston. But I still drank where ever I was and thoroughly enjoyed what it allowed for in my (social) life; I just wasn't drinking five of the seven days a week, and wondered how I ever did it. 

One of my friends late last year told me about how he had not had alcohol for close to four years, which I found really inspiring. He said it all started as a New Year's Resolution one year and it just kept going. I queried as to why he still doesn't drink, to which he replied, "The body is the temple." I pondered on what he had said a bit, and realised "Damn right it was", especially given my quest for a more healthier and active lifestyle. And so, I decided to also stop drinking alcohol, for 30 days, to see whether I could do it and how different I would feel afterwards. 

The 30-Day No Alcohol Challenge was relatively easy. I had told my group of friends about it, and of course was given unwavering support. It was easy enough to say 'no' to any alcohol when you place a little challenge for yourself, despite alcohol being so readily available everywhere. I think the most difficult thing during the Challenge was not ordering that glass of wine to accompany that delicious meal and to complete the fine dining experience - seriously, there is something quite special about ordering the perfect wine off the wine list.

Place where a great bottle of wine was shared post-Challenge, Sydney, AUSTRALIA 2014.

I didn't have alcohol until about two weeks after the end of the Challenge. It was at a restaurant where a bottle of wine was shared between me and three other friends. Because I didn't have it for more than a month, alcohol had become a treat at that stage, which made the two glasses of wine all the more satisying. Having said that, the next morning when I decided to go for a run, I realised how much the alcohol had affected my body (even though it was only two glasses). I didn't have a headache or anything, but really felt that the alcohol had strained my liver. This made me feel more lethargic overall, and made my run slightly less satisfying because I couldn't put in 100%.

I am glad I did the 30-Day No Alcohol Challenge because not only did it made me realise how much alcohol had affected my body, but how awesome it felt without it. I realise that we rely on it as a social lubricant, to get conversation juices going and what not. But during the Challenge, I found that great conversations could be had without alcohol. What made these conversations even greater is the fact that both parties can remember what was exchanged and that future conversations could take place anywhere. This made me more confident as a conversationalist, though I still have those lull conversation moments due to either my inept social skills and/or inability to properly understand sarcasm. I no longer drink on a constant basis, and rarely have it because the Challenge has made me more aware of how alcohol affects me, mind and body. I have not completely cut it out because I know I enjoy a glass of wine at a fine restaurant, and parties still need to be had.  But I personally no longer feel compelled to drink when someone else is drinking and instead sometimes engage in the social experiment of not drinking at party of drinkers, which has been quite fun in itself, especially in the expat communities of Asian countries where booze is ridiculously cheap, like Phnom Penh for instance.