30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge
I know it has been a while since I have blogged about my 30-Day Challenges. It is not that I have stopped doing them. It's just that after returning from an amazing time working and living in Cambodia, I was dealing with a couple of Life-related things back in Sydney - I needed some Me time to heal, learn and grow. I kept up my 30-Day Challenges though, because it was a way for me to keep things light and interesting. I think this is the great thing about giving yourself a little challenge: it makes you realise how much you can do even when you are struggling; it is a reminder that life is constantly flowing and moving. With that said, I return to this little home, revamping it to reflect some newness in my life.
Onto my most recent 30-Day Challenge: the 30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge. Ash is my partner, currently working and living in Tokyo, Japan. I have never really had any positive feelings about long-distance relationships. My first one did not end too well, probably because I was 20 going on 21 at the time, and was hungry for some independence. I dislike the prospects of not being able to show affection to your loved one (one of my love languages is "physical touch"), and I am sometimes overwhelmed by the constant missing and longing for your loved one. Alas, I am in a long-distance relationship with my best friend. It is hard at times, but we are learning to value what we share between us and we are also being innovative with how we can continue to grow whilst being physically apart.
Screenshot of braingpickings.org, an excellent blog by Maria Popova
This Challenge was suggested by Ash. I was having trouble figuring out what I was going to do after my 30-Day Knitting Challenge, so I asked him for some suggestions. There was a story he heard on The Tim Ferriss Show (an excellent podcast which I highly recommend), where an elderly couple would read three brainpickings.org's each day and send each other their favourite piece. Inspired by this elderly couple's desire to stay intellectually engaged with each other, Ash suggested we send an article to each other everyday for a month. I thought it was a brilliant idea because 1) it provided an alternative way for me and him to keep in touch and; 2) I love his insights into Life. So began the 30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge.
The Challenge itself was easy at first, since I was reading lots of articles on the Internet anyway. Link after link, there is an endless wonder of different perspectives and issues and topics that I can spend time thinking about. One day I'd be reading about the life of Virginia Woolf, the next I'd be dabbling in a world of rhetoric and what it means to be an expat. I also learnt about the vagina, a healing technique called Emotional Freedom Tapping, and most interestingly, why Indian cuisine is so damn tasty. I would link Ash to these articles in an email, including my own thoughts and annotations to what the articles have offered me. In response, he would reply with his thoughts on my articles, a link to a new article (related or otherwise) and his thoughts on that.
Screenshot of Day 12 Article to Ash, March 2015.
It was a bit challenging at times. I had returned to Sydney to finish off my final semester of university studies and forgot how much time this took up. I realised with studying, I did not have as much time as I wanted to scour the Internet for a worthy article to share with Ash. I am not too sure if it was the same in his case, as he started full-time work at his firm. Admittedly, I sometimes did not send an article, but rather a poem or an infographic, and would elaborate on what it meant to me at that time. One day, Ash sent me rap lyrics that articulated the pervasive racism beautifully. We were successful in completing the Challenge, sending each other an article (or otherwise) everyday in March 2015.
The exchange between us allowed us to Be with each other - an intellectual connection which distance had no bearing on. The Challenge helped me navigate my own anxieties with being in a long-distance relationship, and taught me to see the alternative ways of staying connected with a loved one. The Challenge has also taught me that we were at liberty to define our relationships. You see, in the past I would often get caught up in the narrative of long-distance, associating only negative connotations to the concept. I think the negativity I attached to long-distance relationships started to break down after I met some incredible people in amazing long-distance relationships during my time in Cambodia. It was incredibly inspiring and each couple had their own struggles and happy tales to share. But I never really got it until I started practicing in my own long-distance relationship; there is a difference between learning about tripping over and actually tripping over in real life. It is this latter, experience-based learning that I was able to pick up in my 30-Day Articles to Ash Challenge. I am grateful to have a partner who participated in the Challenge with me, allowing us to grow as we did (and continuing to do so in this moment).